Oh, the comments section. During the initial Covid shutdown I lost hours (hours!) to the comments sections of various blogs and news sites. My world had drastically shrunk, and I was eager for an escape. Some of the comments I read were thoughtful and made me rethink my stance on various issues; others were mean and downright hurtful.
But! There’s one comments section that always makes me laugh, and it’s found in an unlikely place: The New York Times’ Cooking site. I visit the site for recipe ideas, but I stay for the comments. (Actually, the comments section is called “Cooking Notes,” which the editors say helps prevent snark.) There’s even an Instagram account @nytimescookingcomments that reposts the funniest and strangest comments left on the site.
Here are a few gems:
• “How r y’all having problems with this I am eleven and I can do it easy peasy” (recipe: Yellow Sheet Cake with Chocolate Frosting)
• “Fantastic! Who needs sex when we’ve got this amazing dressing” (Green Goddess Dressing)
• “Cate suggested using two timers. I like to use four timers: a third one to keep track of the total time elapsed for the first two timers, and then a fourth timer to keep track of the total time it took me to set the first three timers. Oh, and sometimes I set a fifth timer, just to remind me when it’s time to take another Xanax” (Swedish Almond Cake)
• “The only negative was that I stabbed myself with the shredding forks. Other than that, a major success!” (Shredded Roast Duck)
• “I hate this dish. I made it for my ex-boyfriend and he left me again. He said it was too salty and he didn’t like my parents.” (Chard and Sweet Corn Gratin)
• “This is not why I subscribe to the Cooking section. This is like a recipe from some mom blog. No.” (Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream Cake)
• “I do not believe in eating plant products so I used honey instead of maple syrup and substituted bacon for the rosemary. Delicious!” (Roast Chicken with Maple Butter and Rosemary)
• “Any way to make these without oats? Oats are for horses!” (Apple Crisp)
• “I’m Polish but I’ve been to Mexico twice. This recipe is NOT for authentic tacos!” (Vanilla Crème Brulee)