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Reverse Nesting

Over the last month my husband and I moved my youngest into his freshman dorm and my daughter into an apartment to begin her junior year. They are both now about 10 hours from home.…

Over the last month my husband and I moved my youngest into his freshman dorm and my daughter into an apartment to begin her junior year. They are both now about 10 hours from home. After moving my daughter I took a few days to myself to visit family in Florida so as not to face the inevitable… my “empty” home.

My husband picked me up from the airport and gently asked “So…how are you doing?”

Days before when we dropped off my son I was a COMPLETE & TOTAL wreck. I cried for the first 4 hours of our drive home and wasn’t “right” for days. So my poor hubby didn’t know what state I would be in when I landed.

Both my kids were doing just fine so I was actually feeling pretty good. The saying, “A mother is only as happy as her least happy child” is so very true.

I walked in the door of our house, put my bags away and about 30 minutes later I was frantically cleaning out drawers in my kitchen. My husband looked at me and asked “Um…what are you doing?” to which I replied “Cleaning!” For the next two days I cleaned out every drawer, cabinet and closet on our first two floors.

A few days later we met friends for dinner, a couple that had taken their only child to college a few days earlier. I was telling my friend about my manic cleaning obsession. She was doing the same thing! Apparently it’s called Reverse Nesting. When I was pregnant I was nesting obsessed – making sure everything was in place and in order. Now I have an overwhelming urge to clean, repaint, redo, and redecorate EVERYTHING in my house. I think it’s my way of trying to control what I can during an emotional time. Outer order, inner peace.

So it’s been almost two weeks and I’m doing better than I had thought. My husband and I have fun together – when we do anything and when we do nothing. We can do whatever we want whenever we want. For the last 20 years it’s been about our kids and now it’s all about us!

I’m excited to do all the things I’ve been wanting to do but didn’t have the time. So our nest isn’t feeling quite so empty, it’s just feeling a little less crowded.

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Thank you!

Regina