Lately, when someone asks about my day, I don’t know how to respond. I certainly feel busy, but by the end of the day I have very little to show for it, besides a messy kitchen and splitting headache. (Also, I keep forgetting what day it is, so there’s that.) The best way I can explain is by giving you a rundown of an average weekday in my house:
6:30 AM: Startled awake by 5YO screaming that there are spiders in her bed.
6:32 AM: Reassure her that there are ZERO spiders in her bed.
6:33 AM: Mentally run through the day ahead. Realize this is pointless since every day is exactly the same as the day before.
6:55 AM: 9YO barges into room and announces her iPad is dead. We both cry.
7:10 AM: 5YO and 9YO argue who gets breakfast first and somehow a glass of milk is spilled. 11YO stumbles downstairs and complains that we all woke her up.
7:50 AM: Stream a workout in the basement.
8:00 AM: Abandon workout after eight interruptions. Eat a cookie to console myself.
8:30 AM: Make arrangements to pick up 11YO’s Chromebook, which her teacher promises will solve 99% of my daughter’s tech issues.
8:45 AM – 9:30 AM: Try to figure out 9YO’s assignments for the day.
9:30 – 10:00 AM: Prep 5YO for 10:00 AM Zoom call with PreK class.
10:02 AM: 5YO abandons Zoom call.
10:30 AM: Try to help 9YO, who can’t hear anyone on her class conference.
11:00 AM: Pick up Chromebook.
11:15 AM: Return home with Chromebook and realize the school gave me another student’s Chromebook by mistake.
11:30 PM –12:00PM: Get into a heated argument with 9YO about perpendicular lines.
12:00 PM: Lunch
12:15 PM – 1:00 PM: Clean up lunch.
1:00 PM: Husband wanders upstairs from office and asks what’s for lunch. He gets a death stare on a plate.
1:05 PM: Check on 11YO and realize she’s binge watching Dance Moms.
1:10: 9YO asks to “bake something.” Make her promise not to burn the house down while I grab my phone and hide in my closet.
1:45 PM: Smell something burning and race downstairs.
2:00 PM – 2:30 PM: Rally kids for a walk.
2:30 PM: Realize it’s raining.
2:30 PM – 5:00 PM: Clean the kitchen (again), check the news, vow never to check the news again, get 15 error messages while trying to submit my 9YO’s math assignment.
5:00 – 6:00 PM: Make dinner. Realize my oven is dying. Wonder if I can even buy a new oven?
6:30 PM – 9:30 PM: Remind kids it’s almost bedtime.
9:30 PM – 10:30 PM: Check the news. Eat another cookie. Watch a reality show that requires zero brain power.
10:30 PM: Collapse into bed.